All In Your Face

As a pet specialist working in a grooming department it is normal for the specialist to express the dogs anal glands. This procedure will help a dog if he or she is constipated, and it will let the specialist or groomer know if the dog has worms or not.

One day a pet specialist was expressing a dogs anal gland for the first time. Unluckily for the dog, it wasn't its first time.
When the pet specialist raised the dogs tail and began to squeeze the dogs anal gland muscle the dog said, " oh, oh , oh, and the pet specialist said, "sh..". The dog replied back, "All in your face".

Both Ways
Some dogs like rotweillers, bull dogs and pits don't like having their anal glands expressed and will snap at you if you attempt to express their anal glands.
On one particular day the pet specialist was expressing a dogs anal gland with extreme caution, but to the specialist surprise the dog gleefully turned and looked at the pet specialist and said, "You didn't know I go both ways, did you"?

What Happened To Yours?
One day, a huge Labrodor came into the grooming salon to be groomed. A few minutes later a normal sized Lab, and his pup came into the salon. All three dogs were ready to leave the salon around the same time.
The pet specialist's daughter was at the salon that day also. When the huge Lab walked past her towards the front counter, she looked and said, "dang!"
Her father asked her what? But, she said nothing. He later looked up at the lab, and said, "dang, he got some big cahoones!"
His daughter said, "That's what I was trying to say."
The Lab's cahoones were touching the floor.
He walked with a swagger as if they hurt him to walk, or as if he was strutting his stuff, because he knew that he had some big cahoones.
The pup saw the huge Lab's cahoones, and asked his father what were they. His father than strutted towards the front of the salon, and said, "ah, son you'll get some like that when you get around our age."
The pup then looked at his dads, as he strutted towards the front, and said, "then what happened to yours?"

"Uncle, Guess What?"
The pet specialist had a brother temporarily living with him, that weighed over 250 pounds. He told his daughter that they were going to play a joke on him, and so he told her what the joke was.
When they got home from the salon. The little girl ran to her uncle and said, "uncle guess what?" He replied, "what?" She said, "today, I saw a dog with balls bigger than yours."