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Chiquita Banana Terrorist Connections

posted March 14, 2007 - 8:19pm
Chiquita Banana Terrorist Connections

Banana giant Chiquita Brands International has agreed to pay a $25 million fine for it’s role in funding and protecting a Columbian terrorist. Consumers may finally become aware of the role “harmless” food companies play in increasing global chaos. Recent events in the Axis of Grocery Evil include:
• Dole supplying pineapples to Al Qaeda training camps for grenade practice
• Green Giant camouflage for Sri Lankan Tamil Tigers
• Hormel researching more powerful beans and canned chili to mask Saran gas attacks.
• Frito-Lay has been smuggling ammunition to the Shining Path Guerillas for years.
• Sinn Fein relies on Little Debbie Snack Cakes to provide safe houses across the U.K.

Chiquita Banana Company Admits Paying Colombian Terror Groups Over $1 Million to Protect Farms.
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,258804,00.html

Chiquita Charged With Terrorist Dealings.
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/03/14/terror/main2571113.shtml

Author: Mike Reilly
-A +A


Comments

Wrong end of the bat

Mike Reilly - Wed, 2007-14-3 11:19 pm
Chiquita paid a $25 million fine for only $1 million of "bribes". The irony is that $25 million will make its way into the government's General Revenue where some will be used to finance the the next wave of foreign terrorists. In a related story, the Department of Homeland Security has ordered all DVD copies of Woody Allen's 1971 film "Bananas" be removed from Blockbuster stores. VHS tapes can remain since anyone still using a VCR can't possibly pose a threat.

Equal-opportunity bribery

Idlewild - Wed, 2007-14-3 9:37 pm
At least the company was even-handed... they paid off both right-wing *and* left-wing terrorists! It's all Frito-Lays' fault;in the '70s they had an advertising mascot called the Frito Bandito, that's probably where Chiquita got the idea! Sue Pepsico! This all adds a new meaning to the term "banana republic," doesn't it?

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