Hi there, would you like to talk about becoming a Costco member?

No, thank you.

It's a nominal membership fee and we offer money-saving deals every day.

No, thank you.

Try our Costco muffin if you want, or perhaps a Costco cookie?

Thank you, but those muffins are huge and I'm allergic to nuts anyway.

OK, we'll be in the lobby all day if you want to swing back by and take a look at our catalogue. Membership is only $50 a year now!

My response in my head was...So I pay you to join a club to buy food-from-the-land-of-big so my kids end up eating more cereal every week than they actually needed? I just don't see the benefit. Well, toilet paper, maybe, but people really don't save money. They just eat more. I don't want to have to pay to save money and you're kind of excluding the very people who need to save money by requiring a membership fee.

But my response to the lady in the lobby was actually...Thanks anyway, have a good day.