Ladies and gentlemen, Andrew Huang is taking requests. Visit his website, Songs to Wear Pants To, tell him your stories, and he’ll set them to music. Huang, who is based in Toronto, does do pro bono work, but if you’re looking for a ghost-written valentine, jumping the queue will cost you (The rates go from $50 to $200 per song minute.). You can pick out the lyrics, genres, and instruments, or give the artist free rein. But before you do,

visit the site’s archive and hear the hundreds of silly, infectious, heartfelt ditties he’s already recorded: "Never Been in Love," "You Love Her So Much It’s Embarrassing,"

and "Stacey, Be My Barbie Doll" are a few to get an idea of his work. Hmmm, if you don't have the cash to jump the line, perhaps looking through the archives will provide you with a ready-made valentine. Also, this site would be great for other events than Valentine's Day: anniversaries, birthday's, and break-ups, to name a few.