It's human nature for less than sensitive, or tactful, comments to pop into our heads on occasion. Most of us, however, have a filter of sorts between our brains and mouth which prevents the more odious ones from slipping out. Of course, we all have those days when the filter is a bit clogged. For instance:

"Gosh, I had no idea you were that old!"

Taken out of context of the actual conversation I was having with a woman friend of mine awhile back, this might look like and out-and-out slam. On the contrary, it was simply a poorly worded compliment. I meant only to impart that said individual had aged remarkably well. In the end, though, it came out sounding like I was accusing her of being "old". It was at that moment I realized my filter was in need of replacing. You know, kind of like those Pur water pitcher filtration thingies that need periodic changing. It's important to change your brain/mouth filter on a regular basis.

While my comment was understandable -- and laughed off by the recipient, for the most part -- what of those people who make a regular habit out of spewing far more offensive remarks on a daily basis? You know, the Larry David types we all know intimately. They don't mean any real harm, mind you; they're just too absent minded to keep their filters up-to-date. Again, example time:

"I don't mean to offend you, but your country's really small."

This was uttered by a boob of a shop owner in Nashville, Indiana when my girlfriend Rita made her first trip to the U.S. He asked from where we hailed, and Rita informed him her country of origin was Switzerland. Now, I'm certain the guy wasn't trying to be mean, or anything. I suspect, in his old age, his filter was MIA. Still, she was offended by the comment. Hey, who wouldn't be, right? Maybe a good response would have been to grab the guy by the crotch and say:

"I don't mean to offend you, but your penis is really small."

That would have been friggin' great, I tell you!

Now, I need to tell you of my own "clogged filter moment" that occurred right after the shop owner rammed his causal loafer right into his pie hole. If I didn't, and she reads this, I'd never hear the end of it. Hell, I've never heard the end of it for making the remark in the first place. Honestly, I don't need to give her anything more to hold over my head for all eternity.

"Ohhhh, I'm from Illinois."

You would had to have heard the inflection in my voice to truly appreciate just how this was received. In Rita's mind, I was trying to make it abundantly clear that I was from big 'ol U.S.A., not some puny little European country. In all honesty, I was merely answering the man's inquiry.

Obviously, the whole brain/mouth filter is simply a metaphor for keeping the mind sharp. Too often our minds get lazy if we don't exercise them often enough -- or so somebody keeps relentlessly reminding me. But she's absolutely correct.