Finding Elder Care Made Easier

With my birthday looming on the horizon, I am painfully aware of the fact that we are all getting older and will someday rely on others for our care. As my mom mocks my prematurely graying hair I remind her that I will be the one caring for her in her golden years. For now it is amusing banter, but one day it will be reality.

No one wants to think of his or her parent as being dependent and vulnerable. Many people are overwhelmed by the thought of incorporating the demands of a parent’s care into their own hectic lives. Whether the problems your parent is experiencing is temporary versus permanent or developing as opposed to sudden onset, these tips can ease the transition into the caregiver role.

First and foremost, know your rights and the rights of your loved one. There are a growing number of websites outlining these rights including one, a division of Met Life known as the Mature Market Institute (www.maturemarketinstitute.com - 203/221-6580), the National Alliance for Caregiving (www.caregiver.com), or National Senior Center Law Center (www.nsclc.org). Many of the groups have a wide array of on-line articles pointing out key issues such as problems with nursing homes, advocating for your loved one, how to find adequate care when you live far from the area, or problems associated with your parents’ diagnoses which may appear in the future.

Be aware that federal regulations allow family members to visit their family in nursing homes at any time, not just normal visiting hours. Federal law also requires nursing home staff to meet with the family or guardian or their wards at least once a year to update care plans and treatment regimens. Failure to do so is not only a violation of federal statutes, but also a clear indication of that facility’s lack of commitment to providing quality care.

After visiting the aforementioned websites search the Internet for websites related to your parent’s illness. Alzheimer’s, a very common and extremely devastating affliction of the aged, has many groups dedicated to finding a treatment, or better yet a cure, and to providing on nearly all aspects of the malady. Those in need of assistance in finding suitable care for someone living with Alzheimer’s are encouraged to visit the website maintained by the Alzheimer’s Association (www.alz.org/carefinder). Similarly, information on diabetes can be found on the site maintained by the American Diabetes Association (www.diabetes.org). If your parent has health issues not related to Alzheimer’s you should start your quest for knowledge on a reliable information site like www.webmd.com. Next, use a search engine such as www.google.com, www.ask.com or one of the numerous others to find medical or educational websites or local support and advocacy groups when you can ask questions specifically related to your family member. Always feel free to contact your own physician for more clinical opinions and advice.

These websites and others like them can help you formulate a list of questions for potential caregivers:
1. Inquire into staff training and staff to patient ratios.
2. What are their rules and procedures when dispensing medications?
3. Do they provide meals specific to each ward’s tastes and medical needs or are they mass-produced cafeteria-style?
4. Are there organized activities designed to stimulate and if so, are they on-site or off-site? Is there adequate exercise?
5. Do they perform background checks on all staff that may have the possibility of accessing your family member?
6. Is the potential nursing home or home health aid properly licensed?
7. Are they open or dismissive of your loved one’s preferences for waking and sleeping times, meals, or clothing?
8. How many of their wards suffer from bedsores and how do they combat them?
This is a very basic list and there are many more questions that need to be asked before someone should be trusted to care for another person. These are serious matters that you should be intimately involved with. If the person designated to speak with you is uncommunicative, evasive, or condescending, it should throw up red flags.

There is a vast difference between a nursing home and an assisted living facility. Contact local government agencies on aging to learn the licensing requirements for each in the state the care will be provided in. These agencies may also be able to tell you how many violations each nursing home has had. If they cannot, many jurisdictions now make their legal databases available online so you can do a search to see how many times that facility or person has been sued and what the outcome was. The information is available as a matter of public record at the courthouse in the county the facility is located. The individual charged with maintaining that information is usually elected and often referred to as a “Clerk of Courts”. They should be able to give you at least cursory information over the phone.

If you are already in a position of providing or arranging for the care of a family member it is never too late to do research. If what your find raises concerns immediately contact the subject facility. If your questions are not answered to your satisfaction remove your loved one and find a new placement or home health aid right away. If all else fails try a website like www.freeadvice.com, www.lawinfo.com, or www.lawguru.com to ask legal questions or find an attorney practicing elder law or medical malpractice in your state. It may seem like a huge inconvenience, but always remember that this involves the comfort and care of someone you care about. Their medical or psychological conditions may impair their ability to communicate concerns on their own.

The placement of a loved one into another’s care may be the hardest decision you may ever have to make. Be informed and be involved.