I was raised in a very strict-republican-conservative-Christian home. Everything was already laid out for me as far as right and wrong went and I got little choice in the way I spent my time or the way I thought. If you don't accept Jesus as your personal Lord and Savior you go to hell. You should always try and evangelize everyone you meet. Having sex before marriage is the worst sin you can commit. Being gay is the second worst sin. And it's a gray area as far as smoking being considered a sin, but you will probably go to hell for it anyway. People who have abortions or support the pro-choice side are all murderers. If you don't get straight A's you're lazy. If you don't do all your chores you're lazy. If you don't do more than is expected of you, you're lazy. Pretty much anything my brothers, sisters, and I did was the equivalent of laziness. I don't want to fully hate on my parents parenting job... we did have some fun times, and they told us they were proud of us, I'm just trying to provide a little bit of background to explain the way my beliefs have changed over time. When I graduated high school and headed off to the navy I was exposed to much more than I'd ever had before. But, I was still the girl I was raised to be and went to chapel every Friday night and Sunday morning, was in the choir, led worship, didn't mess around with boys, didn't drink, and everyone saw me as the little angel on top of the Christmas tree. When I met my husband we showed each other so much about what it meant to love God, love others, and live for Him. We fell in love and got married in Vegas and were soon starting our journey together in Japan. When I moved here is when things really got shaken up for my beliefs. Everyday I saw the kindest, most hardworking people headed to their jobs, taking care of their families, and welcoming foreigners on their trains and in their restaurants. They are peaceful and seem content with life as it is. But, since the primary religion here is Buddhism, my Christian upbringing says they all get to burn in hell one day. I had to take a look at that and ask myself, 'how can that be?' How can someone live the way Jesus did and be damned for eternity? I struggled within myself for awhile with this one. What I was taught was that one had to BELIEVE in order to be saved. But, I think God loves all of us... why would he only send western society to heaven? Why would something only be true once you believe in it? I no longer think I have the right to decide who's going where after this life. All I know is what is important. And that is to live rightly and love others. Nothing else matters to me anymore. When I die, I don't want people to remember my life and say, 'she was the most perfect McCain supporting, gay converting, pro-life little Christian I ever knew.' I simply want people to say, 'she loved.'