You met the man or woman of your dreams a few weeks ago. You’ve been steadily texting back and forth and have had a handful of dates, maybe even mingled with some other people on one or two occasions. Overall, things are going well and you’re incredibly hopeful.

 

But something happens every so often that you notice and just overlook: You get annoyed. The situation is different for everyone, and varies greatly from person to person, but sooner or later, you realize that there is something about this amazing other person that either just doesn’t sit well with you, or contradicts something or some way that you yourself are.

 

But you’re so blinded by the budding love affair that you overlook it. There are so many reasons for this, and just as many possible solutions. Here are some examples:

SOLUTION: Realize that the reason that these things come up are not because of issues in other people, but because of issues inside of you. You are the one creating these scenarios, allowing yourself to be aggravated. Start an open line of communication with Mr. or Mrs. Awesome early on and address these things. If they’re a keeper, chances are they’ll be happier to work with you

SOLUTION: Address the issue. Human beings are creature of habit. If it happened before chances are that it will happen again – unless you speak up

 

In case you didn’t notice, the primary solution is communication. You hear this all the time, in every magazine offering advice and consolation, from your friends with successful relationships and just about everyone one. The thing is, its true.

 

When youre in that situation, where things are good, you tend to carry your vision blockers with you after the relationship is over. Especially in cases where you are the one who is left, it becomes easy to dwell on the good things that happened, to focus only on the happy. It is why we are unable to let go of long lasting relationships, its why we tend to look for people with similar characteristics.

 

I cannot stress, however, the importance of taking those blinders off and really examining the moments in time that things didn’t go so well. The result is discovering things about yourself that you would otherwise not be able to do. Times of stress and emotion cause people to react at the very base of their instinct, almost on survival, and show the world, and if you’re willing to look, yourself, what you’re really made of. Learning how to control command and understand these reactions can ultimately be the key to forming successful, long lasting relationships in the future. And what’s more, this is a fact that is not exclusive to the romantic relationship, but because humans generally react out of the same pool of emotions and experiences, also with friends and family member.

 

In conclusion, the most important advice I can offer is short, and incredibly direct:

Open your eyes first, and then learn to speak.

 

[Next Section: Accepting the Damage - Coming Soon]