How to Survive Becoming a Stay at Home Mother

The moment has arrived. You have given birth to your first child. You bring your new baby home, place him or her into the bassinet, and gaze lovingly at the sweet sleeping face. You are happy and content. You investigated all the financial options and make the difficult decision to quit your job and stay at home with your new baby, providing the expert care that only a mother can.

Fast forward two months. You now go all day without adult conversation. Your entire life revolves around feeding, diaper changes, and chances to take a nap. You find yourself yelling at the people on the television as though they were real people that you know. Your partner comes home from a busy day at the office. Your conversations with him or her now consist of describing the quality of your child's bowel movements and what happened on Sesame Street. Once upon a time you had a college degree and a good stimulating job. What has happened to you?

The answer is easy. You had a baby. You have left your co-workers behind, and entered a phase of life that your single, childless friends cannot fathom. You can survive it, though. Knowledge of a few simple resources available to you can make the difference in your life.

1. Find out where other mothers congregate! This is the easiest and cheapest option available. Is there a park or playground in your neighborhood? Take your baby there, and start up a conversation with another mother. Be warned, though, some mothers can form cliques just as easily now as when they were in school. Be patient, and don't expect the lifelong bonds of friendship to magically appear. It may take a few weeks before you and the other moms are comfortable enough to see each other outside of the park.

2. Join a club just for moms! This is also an easy suggestion. Two examples of such clubs are The Mom's Club and MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers). They generally hold organizational meetings once a month, and schedule events and play-dates for members during the day. There is a small yearly membership fee, which pays for events. You can find more information about these two clubs in your local paper.

3. Take a class! Go to the grocery store and check out the pamphlet marked “Parks and Recreation”. Local Parks and Rec organizations will usually offer parent and child classes and playgroups for infants and toddlers, and drop off programs for older children. Find a class that suits your personal needs and sign up. Fees generally run anywhere from $40 - $100 depending on the age of the children

4. Use your partner as a resource! This suggestion should only be used as a last resort. Does your partner in parenting have a co-worker with a child around the same age? Arrange a play-date once and see what happens. It can be something simple, like a meeting at the park, or something more involved like lunch at your house. Use this suggestion carefully, as family members fraternizing outside of work can sometimes create uncomfortable situations in the workplace.

Motherhood can be the most rewarding job you can do. It can also be the hardest job you ever do. It can be lonely, frustrating, and exhausting. Finding support for yourself on this journey can help you survive, and be the best parent you can be.