It's not easy being my girlfriend. Or maybe it is, I don't really know.

I already explained what I expect from my friends: truth and acceptance. But there's always an additional layer when romance is involved isn't there?

That extra layer is probably different for me than for many other men I know. Yes, I still expect truth because I will always be truthful. I still expect acceptance because I am fairly accepting. But the additional layer includes understanding and at times patience.

I know I am not always easy to get along with. I'm not typical and sometimes that repels people, while at other times it attracts them. But it's part of accepting me for who I am. I know I can be difficult and moody even though I try my hardest not to be. That's where the understanding and patience comes in.

I will always attempt to understand my significant other's point of view and I will always try to be patient. I expect the same in return. I am a fairly practical and realistic man and at times that appears to some people as unemotional. But I am not unemotional; I care about a great number of things including my friends, my family, my country...

Understanding someone is more difficult than it sounds. The human mind is constantly doing something whether we are aware of it or not. Whatever it is doing will have an impact on our actions and our daily lives. In order to understand someone you must know them. In order to know them you must listen and observe and converse with that person.

Many people don't always listen and that's when problems become apparent. Sometimes simply listening and trying to understand what the other person is saying and why they are saying it is the most important part of a relationship. Many people will say they are listening but they are only hearing the words and not actually reflecting on why the words are being said.

For example, I was recently dating a woman for several months and overall we had a great time together. But towards the end there were some issues that I wanted to resolve. So when a situation would arise I would attempt to calmly explain why it bothered me. In this particular case it was the fact that she would ask my opinion about something and then after five or ten minutes of explanation she would simply dismiss it as if I had said nothing at all. That is really irritating to me because it shows she was not attempting to understand and it just wastes both time and energy for all involved. So when I further attempted to explain why I was irritated it would regress into an argument.

I hate arguing, I find it useless and stressful. I would rather like to just have a calm discussion about something and if both people attempt to understand, it is much easier to do this.

This is where the patience comes in because at times I don't exactly know how to explain something or I can't express it in terms that someone else will understand. One needs patience when dealing with this type of situation because without it one will fail to even attempt to understand and then the entire layer of the relationship comes tumbling down around our ears and marks the beginning of the end.

This woman had little patience, no, she had no patience whatsoever and was the first to admit it. I understood this; at times I have no patience as well. But if she were truly interested in making the relationship work she should have at least made the attempt to be patient and to understand. She did not. Instead she would stop talking all together or leave.

That solves nothing, and I will not chase after someone is they are so stubborn that they will not stay and finish a conversation. My ex-wife was like that and was constantly running away. I would call and ask her to come back, I would go and find her, and I would do it every time. In the end it was useless.

Now when I call and ask someone to come back and they do not, I will not chase them. I will not try to find them if they are not willing to speak with me. It's childish and useless and time-consuming.

Many by now are saying that there is much more to a romantic relationship like trust and loyalty. But each relationship is different.

If there is truth on both parts, then there is trust. It must begin somewhere. Trust can either be built up over time or given freely to be eroded by lies and deception. Each person makes their own choice in the matter. I am willing to trust someone until they give me reason not to, and then the well of trust slowly dries up until they prove to me that I can trust them again. Trust, like all things in the universe, is not a static thing, it is in constant flux. But if you do not trust the person you are with, then perhaps you should not be with that person.

Loyalty is such a strange word. Merriam-Webster defines the term as "the quality or state or an instance of being". A what? Dictionary.com gives a somewhat more useful second definition in "faithful adherence to a sovereign, government, leader, cause, etc."

Loyalty in a relationship is taken to mean 'do not do certain things with other people.' It infers a sense of ownership on each other. But I see it slightly differently. I see it as part of the truth aspect of the relationship. If a woman, at the very beginning of the relationship, makes it clear what I can expect from her, then I have no problems accepting a great many things. Yes, this includes seeing other people and all that that entails. I do not want a loyal servant or a puppy. I want a companion and a friend. I want honesty and acceptance, understanding and patience. In return I will offer the same. If in the end she chooses to be with someone else, that is her prerogative and I understand that because I would expect the same. Relationship is a two-way street or maybe a roundabout you can go back and forth or around in circles but sooner or later you need to exit and get to where you're going.

I don't know if it's truly difficult to be my girlfriend or not. I simply know what I want and expect. I make these things clear in the beginning. If I receive the same in return, then that is all I need.