The lights were low. The deep voice of a narrator echoed myseteriously through the building. The bass notes sounded low and loud, charging the air. The only thing John McCain's introduction lacked was a laser show with some a smoke machine and some fireworks.

Near the end, I fully expected Kobe Bryant and the Lakers to run up on stage. It felt every bit as much as gaudy as the introductions during an NBA game.

Then reality sunk in as John McCain strided up to the stage and proceded to put me to sleep. Even the crowd had to resort to chanting "USA! USA!" to keep from falling asleep while McCain attempted to explain how the economy wasn't really THAT bad. Hey, he isn't in danger of losing any of his homes, so what is there to worry about?

The republicans attempted to rival the amazing and historic event that occurred last week... but even with an absurd amount technological enhancement, they still paled in comparison.