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Jon And Check

posted June 14, 2008 - 1:30pm
Jon And Check

English is a funny language. Everyone knows it. It gets funnier when a true bred Englishman meets a person who has learnt his English from the Rapid-ex English course and missed the contact classes and of course his audio cassettes got lost.

Check - My name is Check, I was born in Czechoslovakia
Jon - My name is Jon.
Check - Were you born in a john?
Jon - I take exception to such a joke
Check –Accepting with such graze! You will be fined.
Jon – Fined? For what? I will raze you to ground.
Check – Grate are the people who raise downtrodden to the ground.
Jon – My rage is getting the better of me.
Check – Too much of butter. England is a grate country. I touch it’s feat.
Jon – I feel like putting my feet in your arse.
Check – I do not have ass. I died it a while ago
Jon – Dyed? How?
Check – Lack of air.
Jon – Dyed. Lack of hair?
Check - It died of no air. Couldn’t breathe.
Jon – Couldn’t breathe because no heir?
Check – It growned..
Jon – Why did it groan?
Check – Groan? It bawled.
Jon – It groaned because it had become bald?
Check – No it had oral problem.
Jon – It couldn’t speak…
Check – It could speak all right. Aloud too!
Jon – You allowed it to speak.
Check – Yes. It was discussing.
Jon - Why disgusting?
Check – With my ant.
Jon – Your aunt found it?
Check – saw him but…
Jon - Saw him.. Butt?
Check – let me finish… she couldn’t sent him
Jon – she couldn’t scent it where?
Check - In the hole…
Jon – Phew…
Check - Not few. Many partners in the hole... what you say stable…
Jon – It had sex?
Check – yes, many sects in donkeys too.
Jon - sucker..
Check – They find succour.
Jon – Shouldn’t leave them loose
Check – they have to go to loo's at times
Jon – Put them in a cell.
Check – No sell. We collar them
Jon – Colour them ?
Check - Band them.
Jon – Good heavens. What if they are not subscribed?


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Comments

Ahh...the English Languge

Be it spoken by Americans, the British, Australians, etc., can be misunderstood, misinterpreted, and misused by many - native speakers and non-native speakers alike.

Make a lot of money writing on Xomba. Join Xomba here. View My Profile.

There are

many Italians in Germany! We're all not really happy to be here, but we survive! I need English sometimes in some courses or music lessons. I remember my first time in Germany: I could speak a little bit English but I could understand German (german lessons at the University: read and translate, please!). It was something like: Wie heißt du? My name is... Wie alt bist du? I'm ... old Funny... now.

Italian school in Germany teaching English!

I am confused. Your profile says Germany, but you keep referring to Italy. I do speak English. The teachers don't teach you to speak English, the circumstances do.

How

If you learn English like in many Italian schools, you have just to read and translate a lot of pages... at the end students can read and translate, sometimes they can write too, but ... Do you SPEAK English???? Teachers have forgotten, what is a language: language-linguaggio-lingua-... tongue

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