I have been dealing with some unknown health issues. I went to the doctor this past Wednesday and have now been diagnosed with fibromyalgia and chronic depression. It was a diagnosis based on symptoms I have been dealing with for a long time now with no relief.

Since about 2003 I have been dealing with all over pain, excessive tiredness, weight issues, depression and so on. I was diagnosed with PCOS with insulin resistance at that time and put on Metformin, birth control pills and told to go on a low carb diet. I did and lost a lot of weight and started feeling better. I did pretty good until about 2005 after I lost my insurance and wasn't able to continue getting my prescriptions. I started looking up and trying different herbal supplements to help and was able to manage.

In 2006 I became pregnant with my son. I found out I had a dermoid cyst on my left ovary and had to have that ovary removed when I was 13 1/2 weeks pregnant. I thankfully did not loose my son. I was on bedrest when they discovered the cyst and of course after, I did however go into terrible depression. I was put on anti depressants. When I was able to go off of bedrest I was still in a lot of pain and eventually my pelvis separated as well. That is a terrible kind of pain I cannot describe. I was put back on bedrest due to that.

Then I had my boy. My that was something else. I had a 9 year and 2 six year girls and they were thrilled to have a baby brother. My husband was smitten. That son of mine is terribly spoiled lol. The problem was I just wasn't happy. I couldn't figure out why. I had what I had always wanted, a little boy. Everyone seemed happy but me. Again I was put back on the anti depressants.

Not long after he was born I lost my insurance again and could not afford the anti depressants so I went off them. I soon started to feel the depression come back again and started having muscle aches and pains as well as gaining weight and terrible exhaustion. I was able to find a free clinic that was able to help me get back on the anti depressants. They also ran several different blood tests and could not find anything else wrong with me. I continued to take the anti depressants but it still did not find relief for the muscle aches and tiredness. I gave up and figured it wasn't depression and this past June stopped taking them when my prescription ran out.

Then the pain flared up and was from head to toe. My face even hurts to touch it. It hurts to walk. It hurts to move to much and the one that bothers me the most is it hurts when my kids hug me. That one brings me to tears even thinking about it. On top of the pain I started having a lot of trouble sleeping and laying awake at night. My husband says that when I do sleep I toss and turn all night keeping him awake. That is also starting to bother me a lot. He is also staying tired and I think he may be starting to resent me in some ways because of it. It seems we are having more fussing going on between us and in the middle of the night I wake up to "stop kicking!"

Sooooo with all of these new developments and a few things I talked to the doctor about, she has determined I have Fibromyalgia. She gave me a prescription to help me sleep and I am also scheduled to see a psychiatrist for my depression and to get me on other prescriptions to help with the fibromyalgia.

So now I know what is wrong with me. I was hoping it was something simple and take a pill and feel better but instead I now have to learn to live my life in pain. I need to somehow accept the fact that I will need to for the rest of my life. I need a lot of prayer for my family to accept this, my husband to forgive me and support me, and for myself to learn to live like this.