Main Thought on Autism

As a mother of a son who has autism, I tend to find the need to share my views and insights about autism. Today, children are being diagnosed as often as there are new lives being born. This raises my interest in the matter not only from a mother's point of view, but it brings concern to me as a member of this society.

All About the Awareness

On a daily bases people wonder why parent’s of autistic children yell for Autism Awareness. The truth of the matter is quite easy to understand…

* Imagine your child having a disability that prevents them from understand our society…

* Imagine having a child who cannot tell you what is wrong… or ask for his needs…

* Imagine having a child who cannot comprehend what you are telling them…

This is a life that can be very frustrating not only for the parents but for the child themselves. Children who are on the Autism Spectrum suffer from a range of issues, from physical difficulties to sensory difficulties. Some children are genius others are below their age IQ. There is no autistic child that is identical to one another regardless of having the same diagnoses, because with each child comes a different personality; therefore, the symptoms and issues that the child has will be just as unique.

Signs To Look for From a Personal Prospective

My son was diagnosed with PDD-NOS which is Pervasive Developmental Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified. Now out of all the five of the Autism Spectrum Disorders, PDD-NOS is the most common next to Asperger’s as well as the most confusing. Most children with PDD-NOS seem very Neurologically Typical. My son for example when diagnosed did not have all the symptoms of Autism, just some; however, the symptoms that he did display were very disruptive and harmful not only to the people around him but to himself as well. These are some of his symptoms before his diagnoses:

1. Head Banging
2. Tip Toe Walking
3. Clumsiness
4. Very Loud Yelling
5. Aggression
6. Obsession of lining objects up
7. Perfectionist
8. Non-Verbal
9. Did Not Walk until the age 2 (he preferred crawling)
10. Did not initiate his needs and/or wants
11. Did Not Interact Well With his Peers

These are examples of the odd behaviors that he displayed… these symptoms were the reason why his pediatrician asked me if I would mind getting him evaluated.

Coping With a Autism Diagnoses

I will be quite honest; his evaluation process was not a big ordeal for us, I was lucky to have such a wonderful evaluation team and pediatrician who treats my children as her own. The hardest part was accepting the fact that my child has a disability, even more… it was hard to accept something I knew nothing about and could only associated the disorder with what I have seen in movies or on television. Having to drop everything and research what was wrong with my baby was the most heart wrenching thing I had to do yet in my children’s lives; because with every moment of researching that went by, the more my future with my child changed dramatically. How am I to continue working if no one is capable of taking care of my son? How can I support my little family when there are no spots available for professional care? What am I suppose to do while we wait to get him into pre-school... that is almost a year away! Life as I knew started to change the moment I was told “your son has what we call PDD-NOS”, nothing was the same after I walked out of that office; and I realized that nothing will ever be the same again.

Having to go through the ordeal of wondering what did I do wrong? How could this happen to my baby? Was it my entire fault? Did I do something incorrect during my pregnancy? But he was such a healthy boy? Why didn’t someone see it sooner? Is it his biological father’s fault? He is ADHD and Bipolar after-all… the 101 thoughts ran through my mind, I cried, I yelled, I screamed, and I cried some more, I just couldn’t understand.

The Wake Up Call

Sadly enough after going through 9 months of Early Intervention (EI) what made me open my eyes and realize how much helping my son really meant to me is when someone who I least expected to ever say anything negative about my son said to me “He is an embarrassment to me!”, that simple little line, that dumb little statement threw me into a mode that I believe only a mother could ever understand. I learned to stand up for my son, I learned everything there is to know about my son’s conditions, I studied, I went to workshops, I did everything a mom would do for their child!

My son is an example of what EI can do for a child with autism, he is an example of what early education can do for a child with autism… less than a year ago my son was completely Non-verbal, and today he holds conversations with me. Less than a year ago my son did not know what pain was, today my son reacts the heat, cold, pain, and love. My son’s story gives moms hope; he brightens people’s heart with his charm and love. I watched my little boy go from being closed in and not in-tuned to his society to being very alert and very much a part of our society.

What Does This All Mean?

Does this mean he is cured? Of course not, Jayden has a life long disability that will always have an affect on his life style. He will need to learn to control his emotions, he will need to learn to cope with his developmental delays, and he is still 23 months old in a 4 year old body. He very well could have this type of delay through-out his life time.

Ask people of our society not to look down upon a child that may look as if they are misbehaving, being spoiled brats, who may look like a good spanking will solve the issue. Please know that a lot of time when our children meltdown its because of disassociation with their surroundings, not able to properly understand what is being told to them, they may have fallen into sensory overload (a lot of autistic children are very sensitive to things that we don’t even notice). So when you see parents struggling with their child just take a second to think “what if that was me and my child”.

As they teach my oldest son in school:

“Stop… Look… and Listen!”