My Father's Eyes

I'm not one who is prone to an over amount of sentimentality -- or reminiscing. But as Father's Day approaches, I'm reminded of the last few depressing years of my Dad's life. Never one to get regular check ups, he found himself, at 76, with prostrate cancer, high blood sugar, and high blood pressure that had most likely resulted in the mini stroke that was discovered after a full work up. All this came to light after he had knee replacement surgery. Who knows, perhaps he might still be alive today if they had caught these problems earlier. Well, he'd be 90 years old this year, so who knows. He died a little over 9 years ago at the age of 81.

After my father's funeral, I drove down to the mountains of Tennessee to distribute his ashes in the mountains he always loved. He had spoken about that many times in the last decade of his life. Not too far from my destination, Cumberland Gap, a song came on the radio. It was My Father's Eyes by Eric Clapton. Now I'd never heard this tune before, but given the timing, it choked me up more than you can imagine. You'll understand when you watch the video at the end of this story. It was an homage to Clapton's own father whom he never even knew, since he was adopted as an infant. It still makes me very emotional when I hear this song to this day.

I'm a lot like my farther, much to my disdain at times. I'm a bit repressed, and have a tendency to make a joke at the most inopportune moments. Like he, I am a very emotional person but I cover it up with dark humor. I swore I'd never be like him, but it just sort of happened along the way. When I catch myself reacting to a situation the way he did, or being a tactless bastard, I remember him. I inherited a good heart, but also a lot of quirks and a bizarre sense of humor. There was a time I regretted it -- now I wouldn't have it any other way. As the years go by, I definitely see my father's eyes in my own.

To all of you whose father's are no longer with you, I dedicate this song. Happy Father's Day!

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Submitted by kjhack on Fri, 2008-06-13 00:39

Beautifully said ....

Submitted by Ken Korczak on Fri, 2008-06-13 10:13.

.. thanks for sharing these personal thoughts about your dad. My dad died more than 30 years ago when I was 16. I've also had to survive the death of my mother.

You always think -- "How will I survive that day when my mom/dad dies?" But that day comes for most of us, you face it, and then your life goes on, but you never forget.

+1 kjhack

Thank you

Submitted by kjhack on Fri, 2008-06-13 10:33.

That memory was triggered yesterday when I heard that song again, and I felt compelled to tell the story.

Losing a parent when you're 16 certainly has to be a lot tougher that losing one when you're well into adulthood. I'm assuming he was still a fairly young man at the time. That would be harder than I could imagine.

Thanks, Ken. I admire you're writing, so your praise of my work means a lot.