I rarely write reviews. Honest. I've just seen a couple too many retarded reviews of this disc, some complimentary and some not so much. I'm not gonna stand here and act like I know what the hell "Educated Horses" means--I haven't a clue--but I do know a thing or three about aging rock stars, which everyone else somehow seems to miss.
When I rock icon, be it metal or punk or blues or whatever, ages, something happens that actually closely mirrors aging baseball pitchers--they can't bring the heat like they used to. In baseball, one of three things happen.
1)The guy still tries to bring the heat like he used to. The result? Home runs and 10.0 ERA's. In music we see this too. Look at AC/DC, they don't sound dated so much as...tired. Corrosion of Conformity's new album falls into this category too, and pretty much anyone promising a return to roots(with the exception of Metallica, who went back to their roots, told them to fuck off and made a solid album) falls here.
2)They accept that the fastball doesn't work anymore and learn to throw curves and changeups and the like, but they give up on the heater entirely and become junkballers. The result: a damn good closer, sometimes, but not much else. In music this is the band that experiments so much that they aren't branching out, they fell out of the tree and broke their neck. Eric Clapton, unfortunately, lands here. After "Reptile" he did that BB King album and then that Robert Johnson album, but forgot how to make an Eric Clapton album. Santana has become the Jenna Jameson of music, playing with anyone and everyone his record exec pimp tells him to. And don't get me started on Tool.
3)They become more versatile. The fastball becomes a changeup. The slider becomes perplexing. The result: they kick ass all over again. In music its rare that we see this happen. Greenday did it on American Idiot. Metallica did it on St. Anger. Pearl Jam did it on Riot Act. This is what Rob Zombie does on Eductated Horses.
The best two songs on this album are the hardest, "Let it all Bleed Out" and the softest, "Death of it all," which just so happen to play back-to-back, in that order. Back is the funky grooves of White Zombie. Still there is the heater from Hellbilly Deluxe once in a while, as a changeup. New is the more worldly string sections, the slow dramatic intros, and the instrumental tracks that perfectly set the album's mood. In his old age, Rob Zombie has learned to create mood rather than rely on it. I used to have to be in the right mood to hear his music, but now the first track, an instrumental, sets it perfectly and sucks me into his world. I guess doing campy horror movies was good for him, as I'm sure the mood on the set was not right until he set it.
Overall, a great album with only a couple drawbacks. 1)He didnt' have to re-do the woman moaning thing from AstroCreep. 2)Too short! 3)Where'd the corpse paint go?! 4)WTF is an educated horse?!