I like that it's metaphorical and uses images to convey the ideas. I'd like to see it revised, with more attention to the rhyme scheme. The poem sets up an expectation, insofar as the rhyme is concerned: it begins with the second ("oars") and fourth ("sores") lines rhymed. The reader then expects "direction" to have a rhyme where "mast" is; but, as is the case now, "mast" rhymes with "cast," setting up a new rhyme scheme. I'm not super big on rhyming poems (except for those by the masters, like Yeats and Dickinson) because they can tend to focus young poets on the rhyme too exclusively, to the detriment of the poem itself. But when rhymes are done well, they can be very good. If you revise it, then think about a more traditional rhyme scheme, following this model: Waves of unconscious, A boat without oars, *** The salt burns my eyes, And stings in my sores, *** The wind carries me, Without choice or direction *** The sun unforgiving _______________________*** On the ocean I was cast, Searching for a ship *** As I drift consciously, Soon an island ends my trip ***