Second Chance

Silently I look at you with eyes like pools of water
Breathing deeply. Sighing, gasping lonely hearted.
Heart broken at the thought of losing you.
A second without you is a lifetime of loneliness.
Black is the day I walk alone, my love in another place
With a man with a different face than mine,
A crime. Is this a wicked dream of twisted fate
And treason filing me with hate?
I cannot rest, there is no place for me to rest
To shelter from the storm of this doom,
I boom and below out your name into the windy air.
Still I die alone.
You cannot hear my call and if you could
I fear that you would stay away,
Until the end of time, in line
I blame no other than myself.
For I am like a ruin now decaying double time
From the cold shoulder given me by you.
I see you now but only in my memory.
Always will you be and always you will stay
Until my hair recedes discoloured white and shades of grey.
Cold sweats wash over me now
Cleanse my spirit soothe my troubled soul.
Then I hear a noise and stir
I wake inside I am not alone
I see you still, settled, smiling in your sleep.
A solitary tear begins and falls
Onto my chin and then my pillow.
Thankful now to be reborn to see your face,
I wait in earnest now for a new morning
Watching you silently once more.
I sit and wait to hear your calming voice,
Begging you to call my name. I know I am the same inside
Yet on the surface, I must alter things about myself
To make the good things great again for us.
I have to change my ways for I have seen
Into my future nightmare not yet born.
I must now escape my fate and in reality achieve
A better place for the both of us to be.
I will improve and yes, I will be great again
And make you proud of me again.
Thus the value of yourself will rise
Ten thousand highs with fewer lows.
For now, I know which way to go
I see the path I need to choose
To fight each battle crossing me.
Yet some I know I will not win,
Despite all that, I know that I will
Take the war. For that is you
And something I could never lose.

Copyright © Matthew P. Nicholson 2005

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