“The youngest known victim of Grafton’s madness was an eight year old girl named Allie Nilsson. She was a member of my parish.”

Father Marten’s eyes seem to have found something particularly interesting under his fingernails. He does not look up even for a moment.

“Grafton admitted to killing her. He admitted it to me directly. He took great delight in seeing my reaction. The police have tried to convince him to talk. They’ve tried every method they know how. He refuses to say where he disposed of the body. Of course, Allie isn’t the only one, but she’s the one that’s closest to me.”

Father Marten’s hands clench into fists so tight that his knuckles turn a ghostly white. His lips tremble along with the breath that rasps in and out of his lungs.

“If you’d only met her, Grady. She was a wonderful girl. Beautiful. Full of life. She was adored by everyone. He took her because he knew it would hurt all of us. That bastard took her because he knew they would send me and then he would be able to tell me what he did to her. God help me, Grady, the things he told me. The things he did. Her parents are a wreck. Their marriage is held together by my promises alone. I assured them I would find out where their daughter is.”

Grady finally sits down. His head is spinning. His anger, so bright and furious a moment ago, now seems like a dim ember. Yes, he was lied to, but now he can understand the circumstances. Still, the ramifications of what Father Marten is asking him to do jeopardize his own soul in addition to the souls of so many others.

“Do they know about me?”

“No. I told them I would use every means I had at my disposal. We tried legal means to stay the execution. We tried to get authorization to use some kind of truth serum. His lawyers are good. He wants time to run out and he wants to stare me in the face as he goes.”

“I’m not some police psychic, Father Marten.”

“I know. But I recalled when I last spoke to your father that when the souls of the dead pass through you that you see the sins they’ve committed. Your father told me you relive the darkest moments of each one.’

“This is true. It comes in a rush. Flashes, mostly. I don’t know if I’ll be able to see anything that anyone will find of any use.”

“I had to try, Grady. I didn’t want to use psychics. There’s not one I trust. I trust you. I believe in what you can do. I’d seen your father work many times. I’m sorry I lied to you, but I have to know.”

“Do you realize the ramifications of sending an unrepentant soul into the hereafter with a clean slate?”

“Grady, according to my beliefs, if you don’t accept Jesus as the Savior then it doesn’t matter. Grafton’s made it plain that he doesn’t believe in God or anything else. According to the doctrines of my church he’s going to Hell regardless.”

“I’m glad you can so easily believe.”

“Don’t you. Grady?”

“That’s the curse, isn’t it? I know that the human soul exists. I know that it goes on to something after we die. However, I am just the door and I always face out. I can never turn around to see what’s in the house. I don’t know if heaven awaits or if there’s a hell, father. I won’t until it’s my turn to go.”

Grady looked down at the table. He was in turmoil. He raged at Grafton for his evil but he raged at Father Marten for his deception. Which was the worse of the two evils?

“What will it do to my own soul to absorb the sins of that monster? It’s what I struggle with every day, father. What happens to my soul with every sin that washes through it. What happens to my soul especially when the sins are as large as this man’s. Each soul is so heavy when it passes through. I can feel it. So many are filled with a million, maybe a billion, small sins. Every so often you get someone with larger sins hidden away. The hit me like a bat across the face. What will this one do? What if I don’t even survive it?”

Father Marten reaches across the table and touches Grady’s hand. Grady takes the hand because he needs to hold onto something at that moment.

“I’m sorry, Grady. I’d understand if you just got up and left. I should have been honest with you from the start. I was afraid you wouldn’t show up if I was. I figured the rest would just find a way to work itself out.”

Grady looks at Father Marten with anguish in his eyes.

“You know I won’t be able to say no. You know I won’t get up and walk out even though every fiber of my body wants to do just that.”

Grady stands suddenly and walks towards the door. Father Marten stands suddenly as well, convinced that despite his last sentence, Grady intends to walk away.

“Where are you going, Grady?”

“I need to talk to him again. There’s one more thing we can try.”

Grady walks purposefully past the guards. The guards on death row are once again standing in front of the killer’s cell. They seem surprised as Grady walks back in and strides up to the bars. One of the guards attempts to push Grady back but Grady moves his arm away and approaches the bars. Grafton also appears startled and he opens his mouth to say something.

“Let him alone.”

At Father Marten’s words the guard removes his hand. Father Marten motions to them to follow him and the reluctantly leave their spots and move back down the hall. Grafton stares at Grady but does not move from his position on the bunk. Grady meets his gaze almost without blinking as if he is looking through the man and deep inside him.

“Did you know that when a person is about to die they cast a kind of aura? I can see it. It’s like the soul knows what’s coming so it starts to cast off bits of itself. When I touch someone who is about to die, I can see things. It’s not like the overpowering sensations that come when the soul passes through after death but I get memories. I get flashes. I can see the aura all around you right now, Luis. You positively reek of it.”

“Shut up. Get the hell away from my cell.”

“You look frightened to me, Luis. Death is sitting right here in the cell with you and its black and it surrounds you. Your soul, though, gives off a yellow color. A yellow color seems appropriate to me.”

Grafton leaps off the bed and charges the bars. Grady holds his ground. Grafton reaches through the bars to grab Grady’s collar and Grady grabs the murderer’s wrists.

There is a gasp from Grafton. His mouth falls open. It’s as if he is being electrocuted. He is unable to let go. His eyes go wide. Grady’s mind fills with images.

“You were only seven. It was an uncle, wasn’t it? An uncle and a cousin. They used to take you on fishing trips. That’s what they called them anyway. They’d take you out to a lake and they’d make you dress up for them. Little dresses. They called you their little girl. They’d take turns with you all weekend long and no matter how much you screamed they wouldn’t stop. In fact, it made them like it more. Ever since then you’ve been trying to kill the image you have of yourself. You think of yourself as a frightened little girl in the woods and you act tough and kill other pretty girls in an attempt to kill that memory.”

Grady pushes the hands away. Grafton stars in horror and disbelief at Grady. He backs away from the man in fear. He continues to back away until the wall of the small cell collides with his back.

“Get away from me, you freak. Get the hell away from me! GUARD!”

“Just tell me where Allie Nilsson is, Luis. Just tell me because I’ll find out. I’ll see it all. I see everything you did. You thought you were alone in this world, but I’ll see everything. Tell me”

“GUARD! GET THIS SON OF A BITCH OUT OF HERE!”

A hand falls on Grady’s shoulder. He turns and sees the guard. The guard pulls at him. Grady resists.

“Where is she, Luis? Tell me. Tell me before I find out the other way.”

The other guard puts his hands on Grady’s other shoulder. The two of them begin to pull him away. He begins to yell down the hall.

“I’ll find out, Luis! I’ll see it all! I’ll see it all!”

Grady is led out of the hall and shoved into the corridor outside Death Row. Father Marten is there and stops Grady from falling as the guards shove him.

“Did you find out anything, Grady?”

“No. I have him spooked though. He’s going to believe a whole lot more by tomorrow morning. Get me out of here.”

They make their way fast to Father Marten’s car. Outside it appears to have rained. The entire area has the smell of wet earth. The sky looks angry. Grady can relate.

“Does Luis have family in town?”

“What?”

“Grafton. A mother? A father? Family?”

“He, um, he has a sister. She lives in a trailer – “

“Take me to her. Now.”

“Grady, I’m not sure that I can –“

“Dammit, Father Marten. This isn’t a discussion. This isn’t a debate. I’m not going to argue. Either you take me there or give me her name so I can take a cab. Just get me to her and get me to her now.”

Father Marten’s mouth opens and then snaps shut. He starts the car. Grady raises a shaking hand to his head and rubs his forehead. He stares out the window at the wet streets and his entire body shudders.

Father Marten starts the car and backs up. The crowd of well-wishers is gone. He signals for a left turn and turns easily into the road. Two miles down and the sky opens up again. Grady has to resist the urge to stick his head out the window and let the rain wash over his face.