What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden?

Your mother ate us out of house and home.

This odd little film has a lot of subtle suggestions to make when it comes to matters of sin and temptation. Set in the late 1600's, Thomas Smithers (Pete Postlethwaite) is a typical citizen of the "civilized" world. He has more money than brain cells, and hardly an ounce of originality within reach. ;) Having acquired country property, he is determined to construct his bored, shallow wife the most beautiful garden imaginable.

Which ought to cause everyone they know to flock about them with admiring oohs and aaahs as formal gardens are just the thing this year. Never mind the beautiful things already growing wild there, or the woad that makes such wonderful, marketable blue dye. Cut it all down, damn the winds and send for the most renowned garden architect of the time, Meneer Chrome (Ewan MacGregor) himself! (Have to say I was highly amused at how one of the supporting characters insisted on calling him Manure.)

While Juliana Smithers (Greta Scacchi) gives us evidence of having a bit more gray matter than her adoring husband, all his plans suit her perfectly. As dear Thomas oh so busy with plans for the garden, she is free to spin her own webs and entertain herself pretty much however, and with whomever, she may fancy. How very fortunate for her that Meneer Chrome isn't just the hottest creator of gardens, he's young and rather handsome too! This poor Dutch lad hardly knows how to deal with the tug of war for his attention between Thomas and Juliana, when he's nearly blown completely off his course by their only child, Anne (Carmen Chaplin).

Anne, who prefers to be called Thea, definitely has her own way of seeing the world. Unfortunately for this independent, creative, perceptive soul she's stuck with Thomas and Juliana for parents. Her frustration with their constant superficial, hypocritical drivel certainly does drive her to some very odd lengths, but frankly...I sympathized with her...a Lot! She loves and respects Nature as a sacred force unto itself, longs for poetry, and honesty. Anne knows, with wisdom beyond her years, that it is never wise to fly in the face of Mother Nature. At best Anne can only be amused by the adults Providence has given her to, at worst she is driven nearly mad by all their attempts to "cure" her of this "mental affliction".

Of course, they are rather busy. So, naturally, there are plenty of nuns about to keep an eye on her and the obligatory doctor. Yes, medicine really shone in that era didn't it? Anne's "ill humors" are treated by such ground breaking methods as placing a black velvet bag over her head and confining her to her room. Apparently her problems stem from an overload of stimuli, and have nothing to do with an intelligent, sensitive young woman's aggravation over what current society expects of her. When all else fails though, there is always that incredibly soothing looking practice...cupping. (It involves heat and jars applied to one's back, you don't really want to know more.)

Throughout all this familial chaos, Meneer is determined to prove his talents in his chosen arts. It is only when Juliana's old friend and former fiance, Fitzmaurice (Richard E. Grant), arrives on the scene that we begin to suspect ulterior motives at the heart of all these plans for an elaborate, ill-fated ..and costly, garden.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Pete Postlethwaite has a way of charming me, no matter how disagreeable I may find his character. Thomas is hopelessly demanding, domineering, and gauche. Yet for all his own push, he is rather easily led as long as you don't let on that you are leading him. In far less dramatic fashion, I often run across folks who seem just as determined to drive themselves into complete ruin when they seize upon a course they have decided to follow.

Pride, Envy, and Greed are separate sins, but they often seem to intertwine. Postlethwaite, as always, plays his part with flair and braids all of these strands into Thomas. He very aptly displays how easy it is to foolishly fall into these pitfalls, and justify nearly anything to yourself despite all evidence to the contrary. Thanks Pete, it's much easier to identify folly in others. It's more fun too!

Greta Scacchi is another actress that I never seem to tire of, even here where she is the proverbial cat in the garden. I've always thought that she was wonderful at portraying innocent enthusiasm, so it was a double delight to see her do so with such a selfish and devious mind behind those wide eyes. Her main job as Juliana is to illustrate the sins of Lust, Lying, and Sloth with just a touch of avarice. The easiest lies are those we tell ourselves, and once we swallow those whole it's Anyone's guess how far down we'll slide.

Before Emancipation, I believe that many women, most especially women of means, were ruled by many of the same traits that are portrayed in Juliana. Society at that time expected women to be entirely occupied with things like fashion and domestic pursuits, to marry well, to do nothing vigorous (unseemly!), to be "demure" (keep your mouth shut and don't think), and look very well doing all these taxing things.

Yes, virtues were very good things for ladies to display, but seldom was more than a paper thin pretense at such things actually required, at least of those ladies who either a. married well or b. came from wealth and prestige to begin with. Greta Scacchi does a delightful job of depicting just such a socially accomplished lady that was most likely very common at that time; Shallow, devious, self-centered, with only her next tumble, or purchase to keep her from being completely idle.

I haven't seen Richard Grant in very many films, but this one is definitely a contrast to the other roles I Have seen. Wrath and Malice are Fitzmaurice's driving characteristics, with a healthy dose of greed, envy, lust, and pride to round him out. He doesn't make for very nice company no matter how you round those qualities out though. Grant made Fitzmaurice believable though, and even manages to give this highly focused character a bit of depth and sparkle. Rather like a shallow pool under the right lighting. As I watched Fitz go into fits of barely controlled emotion, I couldn't help wondering if such a role would really be enjoyable. Grant did an admirable job of portraying someone made to be loathed, and it is always a delight to see just such a person get his comeuppance.

Ewan MacGregor as Meneer is the most endearingly human of all the characters in the Serpent's Garden. It is obvious that he does truly love all that goes into creating a breath-taking garden, but his deepest motivation isn't really about love, money, or even self-worth. The elements can be cruel and Mother Nature isn't always kind. The pain, fear, and rage he still feels at the loss rendered by Her sometimes bloody hands is what makes him nearly maniacal in his need to confine Nature and bend it to his will. He is drawn, step by hesitant step, into Anne's world. Meneer is mesmerized by her confidence, her unbridled joy in the world just as it is, her almost unearthly connection to all things wild and free growing.

He is equally as enthralling with his flashes of naivete his honest yearning for something more out of life than shallow masochistic/sadistic societal maneuverings, and his innate appreciation of all that is beautiful. He is distraught and angry with his own short comings and tries to ignore them in favor of his chosen goal, like so many of us will. He is fallible, but not immoral. He longs to bring to life his own ideal of Eden, yet it is inevitable that he will be just as forcefully evicted as Adam.

It is Carmen Chaplin as Anne/Thea that truly captivated me though. If Meneer is Adam in this bizarre play of passions, then she must be Eve. Sometimes wracked by storms of emotional turmoil, others joyful as a soaring lark, Anne can also look into Meneer's eyes and hint at the wisdoms she has judiciously gathered from Nature's arms.

You know, it always struck me as odd that the Bible, and many of its interpreters, made humanity's choice for Knowledge something to be regretted. I can understand that choosing that path made it impossible for us to remain blissfully in the Garden, but isn't it the height of laziness to sit about bemoaning our metaphorical loss? Isn't it a superior trait to strive for betterment of one's soul and Earn our place in the cosmos, rather than remain in ignorant bliss? I was always under the impression that this is exactly what we are here to do, no matter what philosophy or religion you follow. If so, then perhaps that apple Anne tempts him with is actually his salvation.

Chaplin was utterly bewitching as the mercurial, expansive, and ingenious Anne. She could move from contempt for the base displays of others, to profound love for all life, to sorrow for at how much is being missed in life by others, to infuriated despair at both her failure to enlighten those around her and the restrictions placed upon her by her parents...all in one scene. Keeping all these things in balance is nearly an oxymoron, but Chaplin was always perfectly attuned to the needs of the moment. I was utterly fascinated by Anne's blend of opposites; madness, solid sense, mystery and honesty.

The sets and costuming in Serpent's Kiss were a perfect compliment to the film, but it was the tale that unfolded through the characters that really held my attention. Which, was a good thing as I could certainly understand why this film has been overlooked for so long. It moves too slowly and is far too enigmatic to appeal to a wide audience. The final scenes are something of an anti-climax too.

Let's face it though, how many folks today would be interested in a film that is, on the surface, about gardening in the 1600's?! Yeah, I'd need a nudge or three to keep me awake at the very thought of such riveting material. However, if such flaws are specks of dust you would be willing to flick off this nicely ripened treat, I wouldn't hesitate to offer you a taste. ;)