The dreaded 'D' word . . . DIVORCE

The dreaded 'd' WORD . . DIVORCE

Broken homes, shattered dreams, confusion and heartache brought about due to that dreaded 'D' word . . . you guessed it . . . DIVORCE!

Divorce has a huge impact on the entire family, especially the little people that we sometimes forget during the ordeal. They are confused – they never asked for the divorce and certainly do not understand why things have to be this way.
Unable to fully comprehend their feelings, thoughts or emotions. Your children may experience frustration, anger, hurt, regret and so many more emotions. Like many things in life neither marriage or divorce come with a user-friendly manual.

I know that you are probably still hurting – so are your children. Children really are no different to adults (just a smaller version) and experience very similar feelings and thought only intensified by 100%. Women usually have their friends to talk to but who do your children talk to? You, their parent, ready with a caring ear, shoulder to cry on and there just for the hugs?
Millions of thought go through their little minds and then they begin to bargain or reason - “I'll be good if you stay . . . tell me what I did wrong and I won't do it again . . . why can't you live with us?”

As divorce affects everyone in the family open communication is a must at this point to plant the seed that . . . 'we are still family, we love each other but we just can't live together'.

I found that my children were very responsive to reading books in order to understand what was happening in their lives. Although it was upsetting and difficult for me to answer all their questions I believe it allowed them the opportunity to express their feelings and to know that it was okay to talk about the divorce and to ask questions.

As I received such a positive reaction from my children I would like to recommend the following book in which I found to be extremely useful.

Understanding . . Divorce
QED Publishing, UK 2007
Written by Annette Aubrey
Illustrated by Patrice Barton

This picture book is beautifully illustrated. The story tells of a little boy named Johnathon. His Mum and Dad are going to start living apart and are getting a divorce. As the story unfolds the feelings, thought that Johnathon experiences are explained.

This book is suitable for children between 3 – 8 years old.
Includes notes for parents and teachers explaining the reference of each page to work through the process of divorce