The Non-Duality of Overeating
The Non-Duality of Overeating
Hi, my name’s Starbuck and I’m an overeater.
Perhaps I’m finally ready to be honest with myself: I have a problem. A problem as real and as painful (I think) as alcoholism or depression. And due to my recent fondness for the ideas of non-duality I’m beginning to think that I don’t really have a say in whether or not I’m 25 pounds overweight. I don’t really have a choice in whether or not I’m going to eat that peach pie in entirety before the night is up. The reality is that there’s nothing that I can do about it – because (as all of my fellow non-dualists would agree) there is no “I”. I don’t exist. How can "I" lose weight if there is no "I" in the first place?
Does that mean that I’m destined to be a (pardon the language) fat ass for life? I’m not sure. I’m not really sure what it means, but I suppose that there’s some level of relief in knowing that I don’t really have a say in the matter anyway.
Knowing that why is it still so difficult to accept? Why can’t I just be happy being fat? Why do I desire to lose the excess weight if nothing matters anyway because none of this (life) is real?
I would be so much better off if I could just stuff my face and not worry about it and not care about the fact that I don’t look anything like Kirsten Dunst, Keri Russell or Jet from ‘American Gladiators’.
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Right On
If there is no I then there is no guilt :) Your conscience will come into play when the I starts seeping back requesting attention.
Depends on what you want
If you're happy being fat, then you might want to just accept that you overeat and it's no big deal.
If you're not happy being fat (and it sounds like you're not), you can overcome being an overeater. I've been an enthusiastic eater all my life, but I try to keep it in check, because I don't want to get heavy for many reason (looks, risk of heart disease/diabetes/etc., extra wear and tear on joints, and so on).
It's hard work to control your appetite and lose weight, but it can be done. You have to be committed to it, though.
Nonduality means not struggling...
The great writer Joyce Carol Oats said something like, "All men in America are obsessed with money, and all women in America are obsessed with food."
There's some truth to that when you think about it.
To be truly nondualistic means to "not struggle" against anything.
Sometimes, the best way to win the game is to simply not play.
I would simply stop worrying about what you eat and your weight. You either eat this or that, or your don't eat this or that, and you see what you are doing.
Generally, the more you struggle against something, no matter what it is, the more it entangles you and you get caught up in it. You release the power of struggle by giving up the struggle.
It's easier to go forward with something rather than fight against something. Select something that has fascincation for yourself and put all of your energy into that, and into making it go forward. When you're constantly moving toward something you enjoy, you spend less time struggling against something you don't like.
Another way to get a handle on something you don't like to to focus all of your attention on it -- when you focus your attention on something, it tends to change or dissolve, or become what you want it to become.
That's why I think keeping a journal is always a good idea. I wonder what it would be like if someone kept a notebook on hand, and every time they ate something -- no matter what it was, even a Tic-tac! -- they wrote two or three paragraphs about it -- it would focus your attention on what you are doing and why and help you to gain insight about it.
When you increase your consciousness of, or on, any phenomenon, you tend to gain power over it.
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