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The Super Bowl – Battle of the Sexes?

posted March 30, 2008 - 7:43am
The Super Bowl – Battle of the Sexes?

It’s time for the big game, and before it’s all over one team will be the toast of the town, while the other will simply be toast. It’s an excellent reason for a bunch of the guys to get together. Many ladies are not as enthusiastic about the Super Bowl, but it doesn’t have to be a source of friction between the sexes.

A gentleman may want to approach the idea of a Super Bowl Bash with caution. In front of the little lady, he should always refer to it as a “theme party.” If a codename is required for correspondence with his male colleagues, he may use “Operation: Superb Owl” when speaking but this is less stealthy if his lady sees it in print, considering this alias is merely a shift of one letter.

If she gets enthusiastic, she may actually want to help plan the event. If she insists on stocking up on tofu, he should specify the firm kind. When cut into squares, it will actually serve well as coasters for the frosty beverages. She may suggest stocking up on finger foods, not realizing that when the ball’s on the five yard line anything edible can become finger food, even chili. Basically, she can prepare any health-conscious food item she wants and it won’t go to waste at a Super Bowl party as long as it can be deep-fried and dipped in melted cheese.

There’s one caveat about ordering a novelty six-foot-long submarine sandwich to be shared by all the guests, though. It actually does set the precedent for sharing food the next time he orders a double rack of his favorite ribs and she orders just a garden salad.

By the way, if she hears the gentleman talking about “covering the spread” she may assume they mean stretching plastic wrap over a cream cheese based condiment for her crackers. It would be best not to correct her on this point.

In many households, the big game itself is primarily a male interest. Although there is something about it that anyone’s aunt, mother or grandmother can appreciate. And that’s no matter how close the game is the players still take time to say hi to their mom when they’re on camera. Bless their hearts.

Not all ladies are enthusiastic about watching football though. Some gentlemen have suffered their worst football injuries from women after trying to switch channels from Desperate Housewives to the game. Ladies shouldn’t be forced to watch football at any time, but there should definitely be a local blackout on vacuuming.

If the gentlemen happen to become depressed as they calculate how much money the player’s are making while doing something most men would do for free, there’s always the half-time show where they can watch rock stars from their high school days make millions of dollars for playing three songs before being shuttled back to their hotels in their stretch Hummer limos. And when the second half starts, realizing that some of the cheerleaders left with the band only leads to further depression.

At some point a lady will probably notice the cheerleaders, too. She may even speculate to her significant other that some of them have had “work done.” A tactful response to this would be that the gentleman hadn’t noticed, but he did read something about it being a “rebuilding year” for the team, and that probably extends to the cheerleaders, too. By the way, if you ever find yourself on a football field near cheerleaders while they’re performing, keep in mind that there’s a fine line between cheerleading and kick-boxing.

The only real downside for the lady of the house is that after the game is over and all the guests have gone home, she’s left doing the lion’s share of the cleanup. This leads us to another great football tradition. In order to reduce the after-party cleanup, women came up with the idea of taking the event outside. And thus began The Tailgate Party.
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For "Top Ten Signs That You May Not Be A Great Cook" please click on: http://www.xomba.com/top_ten_signs_that_you_may_not_be_a_great_cook

For a great site that displays Super Bowl history, please visit: http://www.nfl.com/superbowl/history



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