Not being a big fan of flip flops, I'm not sure what possessed me to buy a pair the other day. Maybe it was because they were marked down over 50% that I decided to give them a try. It's summer, after all, and flip flops are standard attire for the season, right? It turned out to be a bad decision.

I could never get behind a show that doesn't attach properly to you foot, and makes a slapping sound when you walk. Sure, they're fine for the beach or a cookout. But they just don't offer enough support for everyday wear, in my opinion. Part of the problem may lie with my extremely narrow foot, which makes most shoes at discounts stores fit poorly. Sucks, I tell ya.

Something else occurs to me when I see people in restaurants wearing flip flops: why is it those are acceptable, but you can't come in barefoot? What's the difference, really? Either way, you're entire foot is basically uncovered, free to emit noxious fumes throughout the joint. You have a foot that smells worse than Limburger cheese and sour milk, gross disgusting nails, bunions, etc...hey, all you need to do is slip a cheap platform on your dogs, held on with a couple of flimsy straps, and you're good to go in any casual dining establishment. You could make an argument that the bottom of bare feet are dirty and disgusting. Then again, the bottoms of most shoes aren't particularly clean, either. I wonder if a piece of cardboard taped to my feet would pass code in most restaurants. Maybe I'll try that and see what happens.

Anyway, I'll stick to sandals that keep my feet securely fastened to the sole. A pox on flip flops.

This article also appears on my blog, Free Chicken Wings.