By the time a school shooting occurs the killer's thinking is so twisted, and his mind is so broken, it is impossible to make sense of what just doesn't make any sense at all. While there may be no making sense of the event, itself, though, it is usually not too difficult to understand what led to the making of an insane (or at least seemingly insane) killer.

School-shooters (and workplace shooters as well) all have one thing in common: They have a history of feeling mistreated by either people associated with the school (or in the case of workplace shootings, the employer). School-shooters have a history of being outsiders and often the victims of bullying. While its true that kids who are frequently the victims of bullying and the target of ridicule are often kids who are, in fact, less socially adept than the average kid; and while its true that a kid struggling with emotional issues and/or mental health issues is more mentally fragile than the average kid, there is also a psychological turning point that can occur in even the most well adjusted, mature, individual (and I'm talking about adults here). What can happen in even the most well adjusted, mature, solid, adult who feels chronically and unfairly mistreated by people associated with one group or another (for example, many people associated with work or many people associated with "The System" when a divorce takes place). After living with an the feeling of unrelenting mistreatment for a long period of time even the well adjusted, compassionate, non-aggressive, individual can - in his mind - discover that he has stopped seeing specific individuals with the offending group as not responsible and has begun, instead, seeing everyone associated with the group as "one, big, entity". Left to feel mistreated and/or ignored for too long, even the solid adult can discover that while he remains "his old, kind, caring, self" in general there is a part of him that would desperately love to harm people associated with the offending group in a ways that shock even him. The difference between the well adjusted adult who is surprised to discover that he'd love to take violent revenge on people of a group who have left him to feel chronically mistreated and a kid, though, is that the mature, solid, adult would not act on his new-found violent wishes. Even the most mature, solid, adult can come to see people of a specific group (for example, those associated with the cruel and unfair handling of a divorce) as not human at all, while still seeing all other humans as the humans they, in fact, are. Once a person no longer sees people associated with something like a school, "The System", or, probably, their own family as humans the only thing to stand in the way of seeking revenge can be the idea of prison. We can only imagine that the person who is so angry at feeling mistreated by "The World" he can't tolerate living any longer would decide to at least get some sense of satisfaction before killing himself.

The point is if chronic mistreatment can make even the most gentle, well adjusted, solid, adult have an internal change from not being able to ever imagine harming another human to entertaining thoughts of how only the threat of prison stops him from going berserk and seeking violent revenge, imagine what feeling chronically mistreated and/of ignored can do to a child.

Obviously, many people have grown up with their stories of being outcasts in school without going crazy and killing classmates. Even those people, though, do tend to have their emotional scars. If children have the kind of parents/family who do a certain set of just the right things maybe this helps gives the child the grounding and emotional stability he needs to be able to survive bullying and mistreatment at school. School, however, is a very big part of a child's life. There is at least the chance that even the "best parents in the world" cannot provide an antidote to chronic isolation, abuse and emotional suffering at school.

Since the 1960's (when, to the best of my knowledge) the first school-shooting took place drugs have become far more prevalent in our society. With the increase in use of drugs has come the introduction of "darker thinking" for many young people. Even when drugs haven't necessarily spurred darker thinking they, and alcohol, can free people of inhibitions. Being a teenage rebel in recent years isn't about being a greasy-haired guy with a cigarette and leather jacket. Teenagers today live in a culture filled with truly dark, ugly, images that contribute to ugly, dark-side, thinking a good part of the time. Even non-rebel teenagers are exposed to, and embrace, some of these darker things today; but the troubled kid is drawn to nothing but those darker thoughts, images, and activities. These things can fuel a dark mood, and they can nurture darker thinking. Violent video games have now been added to the volatile mix, and availability and attractiveness of guns to people with this type of thinking doesn't help. Factor in teenage (or young-man) testosterone and other brain chemicals that can occur with mental/emotional imbalance, and it isn't hard to understand how everything can come together and create a school-shooter.

When parents don't recognize and/or address signs of mental illness in the youngest of children that is another part of the root of school-shootings. Most reasonably mentally healthy adults (and kids) tend to assume everyone else is like them. Because it is so difficult to imagine that another person could do something so violent and senseless there is a tendency in people (in this case parents and school officials) to "give benefit of doubt" to even the most peculiar people. The reality is most "odd" people or sullen people or mentally "off" people don't go on shooting rampages, so realizing that occasionally one does is hard for many school officials and/or of parents to really do.

After the recent Virginia Tech killings there was much talk about how difficult it is to predict which "outcast" may go insane and kill innocent people. There was talk about how mental illness can cause bizarre and senseless behavior and how there was no way to predict that this horror would occur. Its true. There was no way to predict that in one of the thousands of college students across the country one would be so twisted, angry, or whatever he was, and kill a bunch of people. The school, Virginia Tech, cannot be blamed for this young man's insanity.

Where schools and parents across the country have failed, though, is in the area of failing to adequately address the issue of mistreating classmates. Many people believe bullying is just part of being a kid. It isn't. Some kids don't bully or mistreat other kids. Some people think kids need to learn to "toughen up" and deal with bullying. After a relatively minor bullying episode in which my six-year-old son was the victim an elementary school principle once told me, "Kids are cruel. If one day your son just hauls off and belts this kid I won't blame him." That is not the way to deal with bullying.

Parents need to start when their kids are very, very, young and talk very seriously about how they should not make comments about or to kids who are "different". Schools need to - over and over again - talk to students about how children have a tendency not to understand other people very well and how rotten remarks about, or treatment of, classmates will not be tolerated. Bullying victims shouldn't be expected to "tough it out" or "let them have it". I have two sons, and both told me at one time or another, that they could have seriously hurt a bully but didn't because they didn't want to actually harm another person. This meant, though, that the occasional bully got to win and got to believe that my sons with a conscience were "wimps". Schools need to really, really, give kids an understanding of the dynamics of bullying and of kids' natural tendencies to sometimes leave other kids out; and they need to really drive home the message to the youngest of children (and keeping driving it home throughout each and every school year) that being cruel can make some other kids become mentally ill, just the way harming them physically can injure them physically.

Most of us have heard the remark about littering, "What if everyone did that? What would the world be like?" This is the same kind of message schools need to drive home to all students when it comes to harrassing other kids. They need to talk about how one rotten remark from one kid and fifty rotten remarks from fifty other kids can add up over twelve or fifteen years. Adults need to talk to young kids about how some kids have "things going on" in their lives that make life difficult or make them seem different and how these kids have enough to deal with without being bullied on top of it.

This is not intended to defend or excuse the very damaged, consciousless, people who have senselessly shot others to death in schools. The reality is, though, that most school shooters did not get that "crazy" all by themselves; and while it is not usually possible to predict which "nut-case" will go on to shoot up a school, it may be possible to figure out what factors create such a "nut-case" in the first place, address those, and prevent at least some future potential killings from occurring.