Toddlers are a complex bunch. Not quite babies but not big kids either, toddlers strive daily to find their place in their ever-growing world. Toddlers fear the unknown, just like adults. When you get down to their level, there is a great deal that a toddler knows absolutely nothing about. That's pretty scary.

Teaching a toddler to feel secure takes time and patience. This is a huge developmental skill that slowly evolves as a child matures. If you think logically, your child will be in high school before they are moderately self-sufficient. Even then, the comfort that Mom and Dad provide is still a necessity in their lives.

Parents play an active role in teaching toddlers to feel comfortable and secure. Security comes from reassurance and positive reinforcement with every baby step your toddler takes. Be there to catch your baby if he falls, or wipe away the tears when he's scared. These simple acts demonstrate to your child that warm hugs are always available when he's feeling unsure or afraid.

Helping your toddler feel secure

1. Create a safe, kid-proof environment. Toddlers need to explore. Frankly, kids can't play if they aren't given the opportunity in a comfortable environment. Familiar toys and games are reassuring. This also gives your child a chance to practice and master skills which lead to self assurance.

2. Set up a routine. Toddlers, as do all children, thrive on routines. Regular mealtimes, nap times, and bed times appeal to kids because it establishes a predictable pattern to their days. More routine = less surprises.

3. Encourage your toddler. Boost your toddler's self-confidence by letting him try new things. As your toddler explores, he becomes more aware of his own skills to investigate the world. This growing independence builds confidence and self-esteem.

4. Reassurance. Generous hugs and pats go miles to making a fretful child feel better. If your toddler gets scared, comfort him. Remember, Mom and Dad have so much power to make everything right again.

5. Distraction. Sometimes the hysteria gets out of control. Try distracting your child with a song, different toy, or removing them from whatever situation is so upsetting. Often they'll forget what was bothering them within minutes.

6. Let them know the daily plan ahead of time. Tell your child exactly what's happening next in their day. Make this part of your routine. This limits the surprises your little one will face as well as helping you avoid things that upset your child.

Toddler Fears

As toddlers become more mobile, their range of experience changes. No longer completely reliant on Mom and Dad for everything, they are exploring new things daily. They are also coming into contact with some pretty frightening things. Here's a list of some common toddler fears.

- Fear of separation
- Fear of loud noises
- Fear of dogs
- Fear of scary dreams
- Fear of storms
- Bath time fears
- Fear of sleeping alone
- Fear of Santa
- Fear of strangers

That's a lot of stuff to be afraid of. Luckily, most toddlers are plagued by only a few things on the list. Some of these fears can take over a household. It's important for parents to realize our role as problem solvers in our child's lives and act accordingly.

Fear of separation

There's no easy solution to this problem. More often than not, time eases separation anxiety. If your toddler wails when you drop her off at daycare, maybe you should take her to see where you work. Then she'll know where Mommy goes every day.

Fear of loud noises, storms, and dogs

It's best if a child is just removed from a situation that is this upsetting. Over exposure isn't the answer. Give your child time to forget the fear. Be patient. Your child will eventually be able to deal with these experiences without getting so worked up.

Fear of scary dreams

There's very little a parent can do to ease nightmares except to try to make every day as peaceful and happy as possible. Listen and reassure when these scary dreams occur. Consider consulting a doctor for night terrors.

Bath time fears

It's amazing how tub time and water can scare a toddler. Some kids fear having their hair washed while others are afraid they will go down the drain as the tub empties. Try switching to showers or sponge baths or try buying a shampoo shield to protect your toddler's face during hair washing.

Fear of sleeping alone

There's no easy solution to this problem. It's wholly dependent on your parenting style. However, as you transition your child to his own bed, make sure you provide some comfort items. Try a special blanket, stuffed animal, or night light. And let your toddler know Mommy and Daddy are always right nearby.

Fear of Santa and strangers

Strangers are just plain scary to toddlers. Often, your child will be complete shy around someone new or maybe absolutely terrified. This is a normal response to the unknown. Luckily, Santa only visits once a year. Most likely, your child will grow more secure with Santa as he gets older.

It's important for every parent to realize that a clingy child adds stress to the household, especially to the parent who they have decided to cling to. It's absolutely imperative that this parent has some kind of break from the demanding needs of a clingy child.

Take baby steps with your toddler as he explores his new world. In his own way, he'll come to terms with the things that scare him with constant reassurance and love from his parents. Before too long, you'll be hearing, "I can do it" with confidence and authority.