i want to go to sleep and never wake-up

I love it when it rains because then NOONE can see all the tears running down my face...how can you break my fucking heart && then come back and tell me you love me all over again...is my heart a game to you???...are you only coming back just to see how many times you can break my heart until there's nothing left???...well lemme tell ya something there is nothing left of me...I am a NOBODY...sooo I got a heart....a heart that is full of pain......I got a head full of stress && a handfull of anger...all stored in my chest...it's starting to hurt...&& i can't hang on no longer...too much pressure...I dare you to care bout' me....I dare you to love me...I dare you to forget everything and remember what really matters...are you up for it??? How come you have enough time to go out and make other people fall INLOVE with you, but then you don't have enough time to pay any attention to the one who already does.....I'm going to smile...like nothing's wrong.,.,.,.talk like everything is PERFECT.,.,.,&& act like it's all a dream,.,.,., and i'll just pretend it's not killing me inside...don't worry...cuz I know you don't care....the other day you asked me, What's wrong???...I said "nothing", but as you turned around to walk away....i whispered, "EVERYTHING"..............................I'm crying inside && nobody knows it, but me........

When I first saw you...I was afraid to talk to you...When I first talked to you... I was afraid to like you...When I first liked you...I was afraid to love you...NOW that I Love you...I am afraid to lose you... but I already lost you...I'd climb right up to the sky...I'd take down the stars...Just to be in your arms,baby...I'd go && capture the moon...That's what I would do Just to hear you say that you love me......Just to hear you say that you love me...A special smile...a certain touch...I'd never thought that I could love someone this much...If the only possible way for us to be together is in my dreams, then please let me sleep FOREVER...Sam, I Love you, but it doesn't matter anymore...I know I messed up && I know were not allowed to be together, but I can't let go...I'm sorry...Just let me Sleep......

I JUST WANT TO DISSAPEAR...Fo' eva...

I am really just done with everything...I can't take all this anymore...I have never done anything to anyone...and still people always try to bring me down....if I did something to you...then tell me...I don't want to hurt anyone and if I ever did...I'm sorry!!! I always mind my own business and people...I guess see me as a easy target...idk...and hmm well let's just say I know who my true friends are and who are NOT...my true friends....I just don't know what to do anymore...I really just want to give up....again...I know I know...life would be so much better without me..ok so you tell me nooo, but what you're really thinking is omg...if she would just go away...yea I know.....Noone knows what's going on right now...and I'm in the middle of it all....and I just can't deal with it...and I don't have anyone....noone cares bout' me...no one loves me anymore...I'm just a failure...and I just want to go away and if I knew the easiest way and the quickest way...then believe me I would do it in a heart beat....well anywho idk what else to write....but the only person I love doesn't love me.....

&& I don't wanna hurt no more... ... ..

Lookin' at you, holding my breath...For once in my life I'm scared to death, I'm takin' a chance...letting you inside......I want to feel alive!!! As deep as the scar, under my skin...it's just like being InLOVE for the first time all over again...but the thing is...I'm not supposed to LoVe YOU, I'm not supposed to care, I'm not supposed to live life wishin' YOU were there, I'm sorry, I can't help that I fell INLOVE with YOU...I wish I could go back to the first time I met YOU && do it all over again......but this time I won't care...I won't live life wishin' YOU were there, I won't LoVe YoU...even though deep down inside my heart...I will always LoVe YOU...but now...now...I don't think I can ever LoVe YOU or anyone else ever again...cause' a broken heart...never really heals...but before I go... can I ask you just one more question...When will I be enough for YOU???......

&& I actually believed just for one second that you cared bout' me, but I was WRONG...&& now my heart is in pieces cuz' of YOU......