A friend of mine asked me some questions the other day: What does "I Am Infinite" mean to me, what place am I in and if I was still a Christian.

Later, this friend went on to explain to me how we must thank God and understand that God is in control and that when we try to live our own lives and fail, that God is there to forgive us.

The following is my answer to these questions and statements...

First of all, I am not in a 'place', I just am, I am alive, I exist and I do so with hope of fulfilling the reason for my existence, whatever that may be. To do this, I try to be honest, to not hurt others, to show love and understanding, and to act in loving ways.

Second, I would have to say, "No, I am not a Christian and I don't honestly feel I ever was." However, not being a member of a group and claiming the group title does not mean I do not believe in God or the foundation of ALL religions... acting in love.

Infinite means limitless, without boundaries. As it states on my blog,

"When we live our life in spiritual balance with the universe, we then know that we are not limited by our reality beliefs, our egos, but we are Infinite; limitless because the Spirit flows through and within us all."

The Spirit is Love, God is the Universe. "When we live our lives in "loving balance with God" ...

In the Christian teachings, one is taught that as long as you accept Jesus and do your best to live your life according to Him, you will have everlasting life. That is a Christian (a group's) "rule". I just don't believe that a person has to do this or proclaim that to be one with the Spirit or that the soul's everlasting life is the ultimate goal of life. The Spirit is within us all, all we really need to do is act in accordance of the foundations taught in all religions, act in a loving way, to have everlasting life or be infinite.

Basically, "I Am Infinite" means; I choose "to be", rather than "to have".

If you follow the Christian "rule" for everlasting life, you are giving with expectations and that, in itself, is a contradiction of the teachings of acting in love. You are giving praise, giving power per say, to God in order to receive "everlasting life."

Wouldn't it be great if everyone were able to give, just because it is nice, because they choose to act with love rather than to give because of expectations of something in return? Isn't that what Jesus did? Isn't that the Christian model that is taught for all to follow?

If this is what we are taught, to act in love, to give in love, then why is God (through the many voices of religious leaders and writing intrepretations) asking for praise and loyalty in order to have everlasting life with Him?

I believe that as long as we do our best to behave or act in a loving way, we are already with The Spirit and there is no need to worry or jump through religious hoops to be with The Spirit later. I do not live for death, for the afterlife. I feel that we should do what we can in this life to achieve what we hope is the afterlife, isn't it better to be what we want to be now and know that we are achieving and sharing the peace and love while we are alive than to wait until our bodies are dead and cannot share it with others? 

"I Am Infinite" means; I choose "to be now", rather than "to have later".

As for God being in control... I don't believe in that statement and I don't mean to offend you or tell you that your belief is wrong, it just isn't my belief. I believe we are in control, The Spirit may provide us with opportunities and choices, but ultimately, the decisions are ours, we take the opportunites, we walk away from the opportunities, we make the decision of the choices. We can do these based on our beliefs, based on what we are taught, based on what we feel, but the action we take is ours, not God's. If we make these decisions based on our beliefs of the Spirit, hopefully we are actng in connection with the Spirit, as in "being one with God," but God is not controlling us or doing for us.

"God is in control" is a good manipulation by the religious organizations to keep people feeling down about their selves; a self punishment per say. This also aids the organization in creating a need of loyalty and dependence to them and their rules. A person who believes "God is in control" is dependent on what the "leaders" teach and in fact limits them to teach themselves and others. When you are dependent on someone else's control, you can only recite what you are told, you do not teach, you repeat.

"Oh, I tried to make my own choices and now God is punishing me, making my life miserable, I better stop doing and just wait for His guidance, His answers, His directions." The thing is, if we don't do, then it doesn't get done and we stagnate. This thinking or belief, in my opinion is part of the "victim mentality" of so many. It has been taught that our mistakes are punished by anxiety, depression, and all the negative feelings or traumas we experience. We are victims of God, victims of life, victims of our situations, etc. When in fact we are victims of ourselves, our egos, our reality beliefs and even our material desires.

The transformation of who you were to who you are to who you want to be is not God's doing, it is yours. God or as I prefer, The Spirit, only provides guidance, an idea for a path, the choice to take that path or another, is yours. God is not in control. What you do or don't do, how you behave is your choice, your decision; positive or negative; for better or worse; YOUR choice.

The journey to balance is about the path of choices in the here and now. The balancing of the positive and negative results of those choices. Too much positive is prideful and not loving to others, too much negative is self-destructive and not loving to yourself, one must balance these energies, these feelings, everyday, here and now, not because of what we will have, but because we are; not because we want God's blessing or grace, but because we are God's blessing and grace.

So, there you have it. Maybe a bit more than what you were looking for though. : )

If you have any other questions or comments please ask or make them. Believe it or not, in hearing comments or answering questions, it helps me to "define" my feelings, beliefs and the sense of the path.

This is the type of thing that I meant when one is dependent on another, they cannot teach, just repeat. I want to learn and teach, to do this I have to look outside the box of organized religion. It is not that I don't believe in the foundations, I just don't believe all of the rules and preachings, I mean teachings, are the absolute truth.
 
With the Spirit in me I travel on...

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MJ's Personal Journey to Balance: I Am Infinite