Monday of last week, I went into the oral surgeon's office to get an assessment of how to best destroy then eviscerate my wisdom teeth. After the quick x-ray, the doctor came and examined the hapless to-be demolished teeth.

Bad news: the two on the bottom were growing completely perpendicular to the rest of the teeth, while the two on the top were very close to the area of my sinuses. Hence I was banned from blowing my nose for a month after the procedure-lest I shatter that thin bone completely.

So an appointment was made for two days into the future. An unexpectedly short time to wait.

The evening before the procedure, I was informed not to eat late at night or in the morning, or else I could vomit after the procedure. Something which I am sure would be entirely painful considering I would have 4 gaping bloody holes where my teeth should be. Filling them with caustic stomach acids was not a high priority. So I had a "last meal" consisting of spicy Jamaican food, and went to sleep hoping for the best.

After arriving at the office the following day, the procedure began with giving me nitrous oxide, "laughing gas" that tends to numb the senses and generally make you loopy. This was done in preparation for the IV drip that would administer an anesthetic that would put me to sleep completely for the whole procedure. The nitrous oxide took effect within a minute or two, as the doctor prepared my arm to accept the needle. Once the needle went in, I was so numb from the gas that I barely felt it. After the needle was inserted, I fell quickly asleep after speaking a few random sentences in conversation with the doctor about what I ate last night. He joked saying that his last patient must have eaten shrimp scampi with garlic. This was my first time ever being under anesthesia, and it was a bizarre experience. I tried very hard to make my sentences coherent and clear, although I probably could have said anything and just thought I was making sense. I distinctly remember saying something, and wanting to continue the thought, but suddenly losing interest. That was the moment I believe I fell asleep.

I don't clearly remember waking up, however I do remember random things about the time period immediately after the procedure. I remember walking staggeringly out of the office with my father guiding me. I remember thinking that I had a lot more mobility than I really did have, and almost paying for my boldness with embarrassing falls. In retrospect, I likely made a fool of myself walking out of that office, but I am sure there have been people who have acted much more strangely than I have. I was unable to speak, but I wrote coherent notes to my father saying that I was alright, etc.

When I got home, I was still quite numb, and so I did the most reasonable activity for a person of my condition I could imagine: play video games. It was a good outlet considering that I practically forgot about the heaps of gauze in my mouth, and also the flood of blood that was pooling there. In an hour or so, the numbness was beginning to wear off, however the pain was not bad at all. However, the worst part was just beginning.

Some advice to any readers out there who are going to have their wisdom teeth removed: have a large accessible inventory of gauze nearby. You will need it. I was given squares of gauze that I rolled into tubes and placed on my jaws. At first, they soaked up much blood, yet as the day progressed, they served less as a blood net than as a drool receptacle. And yes, the drool is endless and uncontrollable. This is why you need plenty of gauze.

I made the mistake of not drinking the first day, as I simply had no will to and found it difficult. This made for a very lethargic second day, as I had gone 36+ hours without food. The second day however, I was lucky to have little to no pain, and little bleeding. I recommend that you brush your teeth that night in morning, but ONLY the front, as you will likely feel more cleanly. I drank more fluid the second day, and also ate chinese egg drop soup, which went down well. I had mashed potatoes in the evening and macaroni and cheese.

The third day began the pain. I woke up at 5 in the morning with my right jaw in excruciating pain. I took one of the advil-like medications they prescribed me, and the pain surprisingly subsided within an hour. It returned shortly after waking up, and was suppressed again my the medication.

So 4 days after the procedure, that is where I am at. Still in recurring jaw pain, and still taking medication every few hours to relieve it. The pain seems to be getting better on a daily basis, and should be gone within a few more days.

The experience is not by any means the most painful or the most bothersome one I have had, so it should really not be feared. However, listen well to the advice of your doctor and take good care of yourself, or other complications will arise that can make the experience far less enjoyable than it already is. And even worse-if wisdom teeth are not removed, than even worse things can occur. So get them taken out early, and when you are not busy, because you may be out of commission for a week.